The first Paralives update keeps an essential piece of The Sims alive: funny patch notes

The first Paralives update has arrived, bringing a laundry list of fixes to the long-awaited life game. With many other contenders to The Sims 4’s throne not making it to the finish line, it’s been great seeing this one get out into the world. The response to its launch has been a big one, with Lead Developer Alex Massé and the Paralives team reporting a quarter of a million sales in just the first eight hours alone. As we come to the end of its first week, the studio has dropped an initial set of patch notes, and we’re already being treated to some delightfully Sims-like descriptions of fixes.

The launch version of Paralives is certainly far from flawless, but the fundamentals of its character creation and Build Mode are extremely robust, and it’s full of heart. Even many of the user reviews that highlight notable issues with its early access state are giving it the thumbs up for capturing the spirit of the original Sims. Of course, any Sims fan will know that one of its most enjoyable elements is scanning new patch notes for any particularly weird or silly bug fixes, and we’ve already got some worthwhile contenders from Paralives.

Starting us off is “Fixed an issue where Parafolks could become naked when randomizing the character in the Paramaker.” That’s obviously a classic bug, albeit one that could give you quite the shock in the moment. I’m also a big fan of “Parafolks will no longer refuse to purchase a snack from a vending machine when too hungry,” something you’d certainly never catch me doing. On a similar note is “Parafolks will no longer refuse to sleep in long chairs when too tired.” Again, you’d have a hard time stopping me there.

One change with more direct urgency is that “Calling firefighters or extinguishing fires can now be done more easily without being always canceled by Parafolks panicking.” It might be more realistic, but it’s not particularly fun. Your Parafolks can even autonomously decide to try and solve the problem instead of simply fleeing. Firefighters are now more reliable, and flames won’t spread beyond the lot they start on. Stairs will no longer catch fire either, “because it caused pathfinding issues when trying to extinguish them.”

Other changes have been made as temporary solutions for specific problems. For example, “Parafolks will no longer become embarrassed when sleeping or using the toilet outside.” This was done because they sometimes incorrectly believed they were outside when they weren’t, “causing these emotions in the wrong moment.” They should also no longer continue using a telescope long after astronomy club events have wrapped up and the equipment has been packed away.

Among the more dull but equally important adjustments, improvements to memory management have eliminated a common memory leak and reduced potential crashes, and changes to the save system should mean fewer instances of corrupted save files. You should no longer have trouble with interface windows that were unable to be closed, the initial loading screen is “up to 20% faster,” and a new setting to cover the train windows while using the Paramaker will help prevent motion sickness.

Paralives patch 0.1.2 is out now. The team also notes a few extra quick fixes for persistent problems. Parafolks getting stuck? Open the menu and use the ‘unstuck’ option. Fire playing up? Use the ‘ExtinguishAllFires’ cheat code. It also warns that items placed using the advanced widget in Build Mode can sometimes move after a reload, so you should use it “with caution” for the time being. “Thanks for your patience with these issues and for the feedback you send us,” the studio concludes.